How to use sex toys and choose the best sex toys for you
There is a learning curve to using sex toys, solo or with a partner. However, don't let the unknown of using a sex toy for the first time stop you.
Thanks to online shopping and progressive retailers such as Target, getting a sex toy has never been more discreet or easy. But of course, that doesn't make it easy to choose the right one for you.
It can be overwhelming with the vast variety available, especially if you're new to the world of sex toys. For this reason, we put together a guide to help you choose your first sex toy and help you learn how to use sex toys solo or with your partner.
What to consider before buying a sex toy?
Before you buy your first toy, there are some things you want to know about:
Safe materials
Anytime you put something on or inside your body, you'll want to ensure it's of the highest quality materials. This not only extends the life of your device but also prevents infections. We'd recommend using toys made with 100% medical-grade silicone.
Unfortunately, most toys on the market are not made with 100% body-safe materials and often use vague language when disclosing their materials (e.g., 'silicone'). Lucky for you, to create our Clean Standard, we've screened thousands of toys to identify the materials that are safe (and those that aren't).
Medical grade silicone is the easiest to clean as it is durable and non-porous (no small holes prevent the collection of dirt or bacteria). It's hypoallergenic and, therefore, safe for those with latex or vinyl allergies and does not contain phthalates, sulfates, or parabens. Additionally, silicone toys are soft, comfortable, and slowly adjust to body temperature, giving it a more natural feeling of sexual contact than other types of materials.
Using toys made from Borosilicate glass and stainless steel is also safe. These materials are both durable and easy to clean. Borosilicate glass is also hypoallergenic. People with nickel allergy might want to be careful with stainless steel toys as they often contain nickel. Even those stainless steel toys marked as nickel-free can still have traces of nickel in them.
Stainless steel and Borosilicate glass toys are perfect for anal play as they don't absorb scent and are very easy to clean. And they're also great for temperature play as they can hold hot and cold temperatures for some time.
Multipurpose use
If you're a true novice at masturbating or are still learning about what your body finds pleasurable, it might be worth investing in a vibrator that has many features. Look for toys, like our Indulge Double-Sided Vibrator, that come with various speeds for their vibrations and can be used externally as well as internally.
This variety gives you the opportunity to explore clitoral and internal ("G-spot") orgasms as well as various intensities to find what best meets your personal needs.
Indulge Double-Sided Vibrator
A powerful, flexible sex toy ranked by Women's Health Magazine as the #1 vibrator for partner and solo play.
Your guide on how to use sex toys
Learning the best ways how to use sex toys can be overwhelming at first. That's why we have the following tips for first-time users.
Tips for playing with a toy the first time
Charge it beforehand
If you're using a vibrating sex toy, you want to make sure you charge it before you use it for the first time. Most vibrating sex toys have an instruction leaflet that tells you for how long you should charge your new toy. Doing so will ensure that you're preserving the battery of your sex toy, which is important because you want the toy to serve you for many years to come and still hold the charge.
Use lots of lube
Even if you're turned on and don't need extra lubrication, consider using the lube when playing with your toy. Lube is an essential accessory that makes solo and partnered sex much better. It moistures and enhances the sensations making anal and vaginal penetration much easier. Water-based lube works with most toy materials, such as silicone.
When you use the sex toy for the first time, don't shy away from applying a generous amount of lube on your intimate area, your fingers, and directly on the toy. Keep in mind that the temperature of the lube can be cool, which can be a shock on the skin if you don't expect it.
Seduce yourself first
When you have partnered sex, chances are that both of you take the time to get aroused before you have penetrative or other types of sex. The same goes for using a sex toy for the first time. Before you get right to business, spend some time on foreplay and turning yourself on.
Doing so will help you relax and feel sexy. It will also give your body enough time to prepare, which will allow all the sensations to feel much better when you finally use the toy in your intimate areas.
Take it slow
When you are ready to use the sex toy, start slow. Use the sex toy on your secondary erogenous zones (neck, lower belly, inner thighs, behind the knees) before you use it on your genitals. If you're using something like Bloomi's Massage, play with your nipples and breasts before you slowly make your way down to your vulva. Make the first time using the sex toy an experience that's worth savoring.
Try solo first
If your first sex toy is a couple's sex toy, it might still be worth it to try it first solo. Depending on your experience and, how comfortable you and your partner are, how open and honest your communication is, learning the ropes around the new sex toy can make the experience with your partner much smoother.
However, if trying out new sex toys is something you and your partner want to do together, then, by all means, do it! It can be a great way to effortlessly do something together, which can deepen the bond and improve intimacy in a relationship.
Smooth Water-Based Personal Lubricant
A clean, water-based personal lubricant compatible with sex toys that helps you enjoy intimate moments.
The best sex toys for solo pleasure
Now, let's talk about some of the best sex toys for masturbation.
Clitoral vibe
Clitoral vibrators are one of the best sex toys for beginners. And for a good reason. Most vulva owners require clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm during sex, and it's the fastest way to climax.
There are various different clitoral vibes on the market to choose from. As a first-time buyer, we recommend choosing a clit vibe made from medical-grade silicone, which feels nice and soft against the skin. Also, it's a good idea to choose a vibrator that has rumbly vibration (lower frequency), which will allow you to feel the vibrations deeper inside your genital region.
Bloomi's Massage is a great option for a first-clitoral vibe. It's small and compact yet powerful enough to give you toe-curling orgasms. It has a rounded side and a curved side, which allows you to choose how you'd like to be stimulated. This unique shape also makes the vibrator easy to handle and comfortable to hold – it fits perfectly in your palm.
G-spot stimulator
If you enjoy penetrative sex and want your first sex toy to be penetrative, we recommend choosing a G-spot stimulator. You can choose a vibrating one that's made from medical-grade silicone or stainless steel or a glass one if you prefer a non-vibrating version.
However, if you want the best of both worlds, then Bloomi's Indulge is the perfect option for you. It's made from the best quality medical-grade silicone, which feels amazing against your skin. The curved shape allows you to easily stimulate the G-spot. And the best part is that it has two sides – one vibrating and one non-vibrating so you can choose what type of stimulation you want every time you masturbate.
Oral sex stimulator
Sex toys imitating the sensation of your lover's mouth can be the amazing first sex toy you buy. There are many different ones available, using air to stimulate the clitoris without direct touch, toys that have moving robotic parts which feel like tongues, and many more.
Our favorite is Lelo Ora which stimulates the clitoris with a rotating nub and feels very close to what your partner's tongue would feel like. It's made out of high-quality silicone, which is soft to the touch, the round shape makes it easy to hold, and with 12 different settings, you'll definitely find one (or more) that feels the best.
Dual vibrator
Dual vibrators or most commonly referred to as rabbit vibrators, are vibrating sex toys that offer dual stimulation at the same time for intense blended orgasms. With precise clitoral and G-spot stimulation, quick orgasms are guaranteed.
We recommend Ose 2 which is a luxurious dual vibrator designed to be used hands-free. The insertable sleeve vibrates and has a rotating nub that offers precise G-spot stimulation at the same time as the external part of the toy stimulates the clitoris by imitating oral sex.
The best sex toys for couples
If you are looking to buy a sex toy to use together with your partner, then these are the best sex toys for couples we recommend:
Remote-controlled toy
Remote sex toys are a must-have for couples looking to buy their first sex toy. A toy like We Vibe’s Chorus can be used as a remote-controlled toy when you want to take your partner on a walk and make it fun. Give your partner the remote and let them decide when and how intensely to stimulate you.
But it can also be used during partnered sex, as it fits perfectly inside the vaginal canal to give you targeted G-spot stimulation (and external clitoral stimulation) while your partner is inside you.
Vibrating cock ring
Cock rings are great for penis owners when they want to play solo. But it's also the perfect couples' sex toy. And it's so easy to use. When on, the vibrating cock ring can be adjusted to provide extra stimulation to the clitoris during penetrative sex. Or, if you turn the vibrating head around to rest at the base of the penis against the scrotum, then it will provide extra stimulation for the penis owner.
When putting on a cock ring, make sure to use plenty of lube on the cock ring and the penis. And put the cock ring on a flaccid or semi-placid penis. Avoid keeping the cock ring on for more than twenty minutes at a time.
The best cock ring we recommend is We-Vibe Verge. It's a vibrating silicone cock ring that can be controlled remotely via an app. The unique pointed shape allows the cock ring to fit nicely over all the right places during penetrative sex. And, when turned to face the scrotum, the vibrating tip stimulates the area between the scrotum and anus for penis owners.
Anal plugs
If you enjoy anal sex, then an anal plug is a great sex toy to buy the first time. There are a huge variety of anal plugs available – glass anal plugs, silicone anal plugs, and anal plugs with tails and diamonds for aesthetic and roleplay purposes. We recommend choosing a vibrating anal plug for extra stimulation.
b-Vibe has a fantastic silicone vibrating plug that we recommend for first-time buyers. The anal plug comes with a remote control so you can easily adjust the intensity of the vibrations. And it not only vibrates but also has rotating beads at the base of it, which imitate the sensation of rimming. You can choose between three sizes to ensure the best fit for you.
Cleanse Intimate Skin Foaming Wash
A clean, aloe-based foam for your daily shower routine or cleaning your sex toys.
Best accessories to consider
Sex toys are fun on their own. But it's worth considering sex toy accessories to complement your new sex toy.
Lubes
Buying a good lubricant not only enhances sex but can make it safer (less friction leads to fewer microscopic tears on sensitive body parts, such as labia). When it comes to sex toys, in particular, water-based lubricant is your best bet.
Other types of lubricants (e.g., oil-based or silicone-based) can wear down silicone toys, making them prone to harboring bacteria. Water-based lubricants are water-soluble, meaning it's easier to wash from your body and won't stain your sheets. With these tips in mind, you should go enjoy some self-pleasure toy shopping.
You can't go wrong with Bloomi's Smooth water-based personal lubricant. It's moisturizing, made with clean ingredients that won't irritate your sensitive skin, and is super easy to clean up when you're done playing.
Because it's water-based, it doesn't last as long as oil-based or silicone-based lube would. So, apply a generous amount at the start, and don't shy away from re-applying the lube throughout your experience as needed. When it comes to lube, the more, the merrier.
Sensation play
Sensation play involves exploring different sensations during sex on your body, not only in intimate areas. It can be anything from impact play to depriving one of the senses or using temperature play to explore intense hot and cold sensations.
For most types of sensation play, you might not even need to buy accessories and tools to try them for the first time. You can use your hand to spank your partner, or you can use a flogger to do it. You can utilize your favorite tie and use it to blindfold your partner during sex, or you might buy a nice satin one for this special occasion.
Whether you decide to buy specific accessories or you make do with the tools that you have, it's worth incorporating sensation play in your sex repertoire and experimenting together with your partner.
How to clean and care for your sex toys
To ensure that your sex toys serve you well and for a long time, it's important to care for them properly. That includes cleaning and storing them.
Sex toys should be cleaned after every use. In general, you can just use mild soap and water or a silicone-safe wash. Silicone toys can be safely boiled for a deep clean (just make sure to remove any motorized components!) In a pinch, a condom can be used over your toy to make clean-up quicker. We recommend using Cleanse Intimate Skin Foaming Wash to clean your toys which double as a toy cleanser.
After you wash your toys, make sure you let them air dry or use a soft cloth to dry them before you store them. It's best to keep the toys in their separate bags (most come with a pouch) so that they're not touching. It will help protect the toys from dust. And store your toys in a place that doesn't get direct sunlight, as it can damage silicone over time.
If you're using a sex toy that's operated with batteries, it's best to remove the batteries from the toy when storing. This will prevent any accidental battery leakage and ensures the longevity of your toy. Also, some toys come with a warranty. Register your toy (if that's a requirement to activate the warranty), so you can get assistance if it stops working during that period of time.
Shop Bloomi at Target
Buy any Bloomi product online or in-store at Target and leave a review. Then email your receipt to orders@thebloomi.com.
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